Hey, um,
sit down. We.
We need to talk. You’re my best friend,
and I love you, but you’ve changed recently.
You used to be so angry and grumpy,
and I loved that. But now you’re coming home in the evenings,
like, happy and excited.
Came home the other evening with a bouquet of flowers and giggling.
Like,
what was that? I mean,
what are you wearing right now?
Is that a well put together,
clean outfit? What happened to the stained sweatpants
and oversized t shirts you always used to wear?
Excuse me, are you smiling at your phone right now?
I’m trying to talk to you.
What’s going on? Where is my angry, sloppy,
pessimistic friend? I feel like I’m losing you.
You’re dating someone? Oh,
really? Like him?
Okay, um,
I mean, is it even serious, though?
Like, have you even met his mom?
Next week. No,
I’m okay. I.
I just. I need time to adjust to this.
You’re going to be my happy,
no longer single, optimistic friend.
I’m gonna miss my sloppy BFF.
It hurts to lose a friend to Tammy.