Miss you before a marriage or no?
Yes. You did? I did. You have a man. Did it? Tell a man. Tell her man. But let me tell you how we do. Wait, let me, let me explain to you. Let me explain even how we gonna get married. We wind up moving in together for like we were living together for like a month. Okay. We knew we were like, you know, every Sunday morning we go down, love forgive us. We literally, you know, so we went and got our marriage license. And we got our marriage license and we were like, we went down to the Alton. We were like, you know, we went sit back down and Bo, you could tell, , both of us. Do we wanna go back home and go through this all again and just like love, forgive us cuz we went to the alter this particular Sunday, I guess it was extra cry on it. And we would just, Lord, extra cry. It was extra crowded. It’s like, Lord, forgive us. We sit down and he’s like, we should go ahead and do, we got our license after church. It was probably about 10 people that I wedding and there were people that just hanging around after church. And we literally got married after church. I couldn’t afford a ring. I borrowed a ring from my mom. Couldn’t afford a ring. I’ll put you look at her hand now. Shut down. But I borrowed a ring and we got married at the church. Now, when we went home that night, there was no repentance, only rejoiced. Come on. It was like, no, it wouldn’t. Like, forgive me, Lord. It was, thank you, Lord. Thank you, Lord. Yeah, that’s, we wanna get married like that. And we, that’s what it kind of helps sustain us through our 35 years. It’s just like we are genuinely friends when you see us. Yeah, like somebody recorded us the other night when we were on stage. We were in our own world. We on stage and I don’t know how this happened. We wanna kissing on stage. I kiss the, I say, god. Oh, it’s like 10,000 people out there watching it. But we just get in our own world and we just enjoy each other, man. You just enjoy each other’s company.
Dave, I, I’m, I just wanna attest to the fact that I’ve seen you from a distance and I was just like, the way you serve that woman. And I ain’t trying to like, cuz I, I, you know, I’ve had the privilege to be backstage. I’ve had the privilege to be there. And just the way you protect her. And the way she listens. Cuz there’s sometimes. And and because I’m there, cuz you real shielded, but I actually get a chance to kind of drop the fourth while I remember one day we were somewhere and you said, don’t go too hot your vote don’t. And then she still didn’t use like. And then I start calling you Joe Jackson.
Because she has one gift and that’s because she put things as if it’s her last time and that she should tell you whenever you hear a thing, she’s like, it’s my I’m singing. This is my last time. And so I’m like, sometimes I just be like, what do you.
Think? So in 35 years, you have how many children? I have.
Four kids and we have five. We adopted my niece or Tam sister pass. We have five kids.
How did the children change the dynamic of the.
Relationship? Right. But for me, I realize, you know, I realize early on in the marriage that it’s me and her and then it’s them. My kids know, like it’s me and her and cuz they all grow now. And so now it’s just me and mama. But a lot of times in relationship, we make it all about the kids. And then when the kids gone, we look up and we like, okay, who are you again and what are we doing? Yeah, no, when my kids left, now I did have this. I kept saying like, we’ve taken care of people for our whole lives. Who are we gonna take care of now? And I said it a couple times and she with a real nice attitude, we don’t take care of each other. I love and I was like.
Yeah, cool, that’s a good idea. So.
They change the dynamic of our relationship and that I’m real protective of Evan. And I’m one of those I, I. What do you need me to do? How do you need me to do it here? And then through therapy, I’ve Learned. That was a big controlling. But yeah, therapy is great. I go to one. Therapy is great. I go to, I do.
Attend therapy. Yes.
I do. And, you know, but I just wanted the best for my family. I wanted the best for my wife. So I was a bit, you know, like, I’ll fix it, I’ll handle it, I’ll take care of it, you know. So when Ned at the kids are adults, I’m like, yeah, I can live. I’m 57. Let’s bail. Let’s go gas up the car and let’s go where you wanna go.
Man. So I wanna go back to young David man and young Tamil man. You guys had this amazing dynamic. What was home life for David like? What example did you see at home that made you become niche version that I see 57 years old. What did home life.
Look like? Some people would say, you know, I’ve seen the two parent home and I’ve seen, you know, my mom and dad were together. I seen the opposite of that and I wanted to be the opposite of that. My mom was in some abusive relationships. And my mom, you seen, she cried a lot. I’ve seen her sad a lot. She just never really found real love. And so I said, I wanna make sure that my woman, she’s spending most of her time laughing, having a great time. I wanted to know how it feels to be loved. Yeah, because I didn’t see that in a home. So I wanted to make sure I was the opposite of that. Because I, you know, I’ve seen some stuff is like, mama, let the go. Leave him alone. But, you know, and I, somebody asked me, you know, what would, if I could go back and do something as a child. You know, as a kid, when you make it, so to speak, you wanna buy my mom my house, wanna buy my car. I told him I wish I could about my mama some love. I wish I could have had found somebody that love her as hard as she loved them. I was like, I know money couldn’t buy you. Love it. If I could just go and just get something for her, that’s what I would wish for Mama, because she didn’t see it. So.
Being able to see that type of relationship in the home and then you being the person and say, I’m gonna do the total opposite. And then later on, I think you were on Tamara Hall and you talked about your therapy journey. Right. Did you see any of the effects of you extending yourself so much to defeat that person, to become a little bit more co dependent on this family. Like how did that affect you as a man? And if it did, how are you getting over that stance that you took?
Cuz I make sure everybody’s good. I have a motto in my family, protect the Queen at all costs, even if it’s against yourself.
I don’t know if I’m a builder, though.
I know I’m just sad. But check. I just, God forbid I decide to go out and go Cuku, you know, I have it set in place. Even if I nut up, she’s still good. Just protecting even against me.
Okay. Yeah, I got you.
So protect the Queen at all calls, even if it’s against yourself. Cuz mean, we can Jack some stuff up. We can. Yeah, women can too. So let’s not leave y’all out. Yeah, but I just make sure I just, I have just made sure that I’m protecting her at all cost. And, you know, I just wanted to, in my marriage, in my relationship, I just wanted to make sure that I was doing the right thing. And so I found myself taking care of everybody, taking care of everything. And I looked up one day and it was like, what have you done for you? And the answer was, I had to think long and hard.