Bottles, Boys, and Best Friends: A Mother’s Musings

Hello, sir. Excuse me. We doing Big Head? We doing Big head? Big old head on you. Hi, Liam. Are you hanging out with the other bottle baby? Are you and Winston being friends? I will stay that I have caught Oswald and Winston hanging out together. Very cute. Like the bottle boys stick together. You know what I’m saying? Like you have the same crazy mom that I do, brother. Take a breath, Jade. You’re so fucking tall. Good lord. The rate of gain on this girl is just absurd. Hello? Hello? Hello? Hello? Hello? My lord, what is this? that’s a worm. Hello? What? You gonna excuse me to scratch? Beat me up, are you? Ew, that poop sounds not solid. Do you see how there’s no flies on your face? Are you guys coming becoming best friends? Because you both. I’m your mother. One of my two sons. Those are my kids. I’m a boy, mom.