Notes from a Snotty Girl Summer: Allergies, Fever, and Frustrations

Guys, my hot girl summer has officially turned into snotty girl summer this day. Fever is literally crawling through my skin. I can’t even touch my eyes without it looking like I’ve just smoked, sweating spliff. And I just want a normal nose when the sun comes out, I’ve got a blocked nose. When it’s cold, I’ve got a blocked nose. There’s no escaping. I don’t even believe in God. But for now, dear God, heavenly father, if you are listening, well, if you’re not listening, just rude. Please just let me breathe. I just want to live a little.

I’m so irritable right now. I’m literally having to social distance again because every time someone speaks to me, I feel anger. You know what’s even worse, right? Imagine Rishi Sunak wins the election, then my allergic ask has to lie on a field of growth, us potentially at war. Like if you want me to blow our cover, you can just say that because these sneezes are uncontrollable. So yeah, I just wanted to show some love for all my behavior, the horse out there, because I personally will not be making it to the end of summer. But don’t let any flower ravage your summer, I guess.