Keith vs. Karen: A Pub Encounter to Remember

Oh, Karen, I was hoping we didn’t have to do this today. I’m a bit tired. Excuse me, young lady. I have been in your establishment many a time. And you know my name is Keith. Oh, okay. We’re still doing it. Alright. Shows on. Welcome to the pub. I manage Keith. Let’s get you seated. Well, would you believe it, young lady, I’ve managed to acquire another allergy. Oh yeah? What is it, Karen? Keith? Cat. Karen, Keith, Keith, Keith. Sorry. Keith Spartame. It’s like a synthetic sugar, apparently. Thank you for that very valuable information, Keith. What can I get you to drink? I’ll have a Diet Coke. Oh, Keith, um, with your allergy in there that you’ve just told me about aspartame, that is in Diet Coke. So can I get you anything else, young lady? I will have a Diet Coke and you will not argue with me about it. Karen, come on. You’ve literally just told me that you’re allergic to aspartame. If I then serve you Diet Coke that you. You would make something out of it. I know you would. So I’m just trying to get ahead of things here. First of all, it’s Keith. Oh my God, this dance is so old, I can’t do it anymore. Secondly, the customer is always right. So a Diet Coke. You know what, Karen? I’ve been trying really hard to be nice here. I’ve been trying so hard. It’s Keith. No, snap out of it! Enough! Um. I’m banning you, Karen. You’re barred from the pub. What’s a good thing? My name is Keith, Karen.