Rock Messiah: The Unveiling of Candy Slice

Geluk, where is she? It’s been six and a half hours. We’ve been waiting for six and a half hours. Who the hell does she think she is? Look, she’s an artist. She’s a genius. She’s a rock Messiah. She’s the future. She’ll be here. Relax. Look, I’ve worked a lot of rock this size before. They never kept me waiting. Not me. Not film alone. No, I work with. I work with Hendrix. Hendrix never kept me waiting. Jim Morrison never kept me waiting. What about Jim Crouch? Once, but it wasn’t his fault. I think it’s an honor to be kept waiting by Candy Slice. I mean, she’s a poet. What’s the matter with all of you? Oh, hi, Phil. Oh, good, then the band’s here. Hi, Justin. Decent jacket. How are you? You must be the backup singers. Jerry Aldini. He probably suits your A N R. How you doing, kids? Phil, beautiful to work with you, man. How are you? Aldini, we’ve been waiting six and a half hours. You’re supposed to keep an eye on her. Where is she? Who the hell does she think she is, anyway? I am sorry. Five more minutes. Phil, please. Can we talk for a second? No. Okay. Five minutes. Could we talk for a second? Sure. Thank you. Uh, anyway, Phil, I think you’re. You’re really gonna get off on our raw energy, man, you know? Okay, where is she? Well, let me check the hall. Candy? Candy! Where have you been? We’ve been waiting for you. Phil Malone. Candy slice, right? Say hello. What’s she taking? She’s clean, man. She just spent six months in the Bahamas detoxing. Candy, how’d you slip away, you bright little elusive butterfly of love? Come on. Jerry Aldini in our Poly Suite Records last night. Poly Suite’s powerful punk promotion. Party, huh? Party! Party! Party! Party! Party! Party! Party! Huh? Remember Taber on the green? Tootsie, Tootsie, remember? Are you sure she’s all right? Yeah, she’s fine. She’s a pro. She got it in one tight. Relax, Aldeni. I hold you personally responsible. You were in charge of her. It’s obvious she’s been partying all night long. Who knows what she’s taking and. Oh, god. Phil. Phil, let me give you a little bit of input, okay? What? Go. Okay. Jerry, could I have a little bit of input? Sure. About the album cover. No, the album is a monster. It’s guaranteed platinum. It’s Monster, Monster. I mean it. No problem. Okay, we’re ready to go. Where is she? She’s ready. She’s ready. She’s here. Yeah. Wait a minute, wait a minute. Hey, can I have your brush? Sure. And listen up. Candy, I’m sure you hear this all the time, you know, uh, but you’re my idol. I mean, when I heard your album making the Pigs Sick, I stopped brushing my hair. You’re incredible. Really. You’re getting a zit. Here. Uh, no, you can keep it. Candy, you ready? Smoke, smoke. Give it up. Okay, we’re all together now. Come on, let’s lower one down. Okay. Okay. If you look close, take one. Come on. Okay. One, two, three. Let’s go. Alright, alright, alright. What is it, love? What do you want? Booze. Hi. You know, uh, Mick, Keith and Woody were thinking of dropping by later. I’ll see you in a bit. Look, I’ve got an album to do here, you understand? Now, candy. Candy. Candy. Candy. Is. Is there anything that you need? Candy? I mean, are you happy? Candy, I, I mean, I want you to be happy. You know, we all want you to be happy, right? Doesn’t everybody want her to be happy? Yeah, we want her to be happy. No, dude. So are you ready to sing now? Candy? Gum. Gum. She wants a stick of gum. Okay, good. Okay, good. All right, ready, everybody? Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Alright. If you are close, take two. One, two, three. Let’s go. I’ll take care of it. I’ll take care of it. Don’t worry, don’t worry. I’ll take care of it. Now what? She wants her to cut her hair. What? It’s shiny. It distracts her, but fine, fine. Okay. Haircut. The hair gets cut. Okay, here we go. Cut. Right here. Here. That’s for you, honey. I liked it a lot better before. It’s really look bad. It’s not good. But I guess it’ll grow out in about a year or two. Relax. I Know a dynamite hair cutter? How about a little Tootsie Tootsie? Go, go! Okay, let’s try it again. If you look close. Take three. Let’s go. One, two, three. I’m six feet, I sing loud, know that? Always dance on the ground. I’m so dirty and I’m proud. So don’t clean it up. It’s got the rhythm. High heel feet and pants to go with them. I am hot for Neil. If you look close, you can see my tits. Cause I want you to, but don’t want you to know that I do. I don’t think, I don’t care. I have never washed my hair. I’m immoral and you know. Do ya, do ya, do ya, do ya, do ya? 2 ah Mel. I’m six months, I sing loud. Nobody always stands on the ground.