It all started on the river’s end Don’t drink the water, you’ll need medicine Our flag was being carried by the King LeBron Crossing that river like George Washington The Golden Girls won, doing twists and flips While you pulled the muscle just watching it Ledecky in the pool winning every race Had the other swimmers all making this face And the pommel horse guy, well he shook the rafters He got two bronze and a deal with Len’s crafters One broke the world record in Paul Volk Another one didn’t, but it was his own Paul’s fault Noah liled by hair, snooping Martha everywhere Bite the metal racer plaid, hyperventilating dad Eiffel Tower, Yikrasan, Turkish shootin’ out Shalom Water moonwalk, holy crap, Guy in Speedo, grab that cap Stanton’s hitting every three while she dances just like me USA we cannot lose, OMG is that time of cruise The Olympics, they are done And the USA, well you know we’re number one Au revoir and see who play in 2028 We’ll see you in LA