my favorite way to get a free snack in New York
is I go to a Whole Foods
and they actually have this unspoken policy
that whatever you eat before you get to the checkout
is free
I recommend bulk tamari almonds
or whole rotisserie chicken
and if you’re worried that someone might approach you…
if they see you publicly biting into a rotisserie chicken
like it’s an apple
just cradle it like a baby
no one wants to talk to someone
who’s holding rotisserie chicken like a baby