Riding for the Girls: The Power and Importance of Female Friendships

Okay, I’m gonna say something.
I know this might be a hot take to some,
but I just need to say it.
On my for you page, all the time,
there are these videos, and it’s girls being like,
I would much rather hang out with my boyfriend
than any friend that I have.
I’m a boyfriend’s girl, not a girl’s girl.
I wanna hang out with my boyfriend over my friends all the time,
24 7. I would never go on a girl’s trip.
I would never part ways with my boyfriend for my friends.
And I totally get being obsessed with your boyfriend.
I’m obsessed with my boyfriend.
I don’t share much about my relationship on.
On the internet, but I’m fucking obsessed with my boyfriend.
If you see us in person, I’m always just like,
I’m obsessed with him like I just met him,
even though I’ve been dating him for over three and a half years.
But the bond I feel to my female friends,
like the. The pole in my heart
I have for my female friends is so.
It is stronger than just any bond I could ever have,
I could ever imagine having.
It’s just different. I always say,
I think women and queer people really need our friendships.
To other women and other queer people
for survival in a patriarchal world
in a way that CIS men don’t.
They. They make friends because of shared interests
and a bond over shared hobbies.
Or interests. They can keep those friends for much longer than women.
And queer people often keep friends
because we have to get so deep with these people so quickly
in order to survive. Where we’re sharing information,
we’re leaning on one another to survive.
Friendship breakups are more common for women
because our friendships are deeper.
And it just makes me sad when people don’t want to explore that.
Or maybe they’ve been burned by friendship in the past,
and I totally understand that.
So that they don’t go looking for that,
or they don’t have that. And I’m not saying I’m, like,
somehow better than these people,
because I have that. I’m just saying I think it’s so important.
I don’t think anyone taught me that.
When I was a little girl, I was always taught, like,
the most important thing was, like,
finding a husband, finding a man.
And for me, the most important thing has been finding women that
I know would save my life
a million fucking times over,
would answer the phone no matter what,
would be there for me. Boyfriends come and go.
Men change. I,
I’m hoping that mine never does.
I hope that we’re together for a very long time,
but I know that if we’re not,
I have these women in my life that, like,
I would be okay. Like,
we would get through. My best friend is my fucking soulmate.
And I’ve said this on this app before,
and Like, my best friends.
I, like,
three really, really,
really fucking deep best friendships.
And these people are my soulmates.
My boyfriend knows that, and their partners know that.
A lot of people. The last time I said that on this app,
they were accusing me of being gay, which,
like, if I was gay,
I would be out loud and proud. Honey,
I’m a straight woman. That’s just what’s happening over here.
I just fucking love my girls, like,
I really do. And I’m really proud of that.
Like, it makes me feel so proud
that I’ve been able to find so much love in my life
outside of romantic partnership,
which I think is so important.
But, like,
there is so much love to be had outside of romantic partnership.
And we put romantic partnership on this pedestal.
So it makes people that don’t have it,
or maybe don’t have it right now
feel like they’re worse or lesser than.
In some way. I wanna put female friendship on a fucking pedestal.
Yesterday I went to two separate places.
I was in a store. I met a girl who follows me on TikTok,
and she said, thank you for being a girl’s girl.
That touched me. It made me cry.
I got in the car and I cried.
And last night I went to a wine bar,
and I was with a friend,
and the waitress brought over a piece of gluten free cake
with a candle in It. And she was like,
someone else that works here wanted to send you this for.
For a book, too.
And I was like, oh,
my god, can you bring her over here?
She brought the other.
The other person who had worked at the restaurant over to say hi.
And that person said to me,
thank you for being a girls girl.
I just love to watch your videos because you’re a girls girl.
And I was like, that’s all I ever wanna fucking be.
Remember me like that? I’m out here riding for the girls
because there. I’m literally gonna cry again.
There’s nothing more important to me than women
and the community that we can create,
especially in America. They don’t want us to have community.
Community threatens capitalism.
Community threatens individualism.
We need community more than ever before.
Go out there and find it. Will save your fucking life.
My female friends save my life every single day.
I also love the motherfucking shit out of my boyfriend,
and I’m obsessed with him.
And both those things can be true at once.
This is just a rant for all different things,
like, about all different things,
but predominantly, like,
so much love out there to go have.
And it doesn’t just have to be romantic love.
If you’re obsessed with your boyfriend and you love him,
that’s amazing. Centering men from my life changed my life.
And there is a man still in the center of My life,
but centering them in general.
To center women. Yeah.
My life is better for it. That’s it.
And I’m very, very grateful that that’s my reality.
And it’s okay if it’s not yours.
And I’m not saying I’m better or whatever.
I also hate that I have to over explain myself
whenever I make a TikTok. These are just my thoughts on this subject,
so I wanted to share them
because I feel like I’ve been doing that lately,
and it’s been. It’s been fun.
You don’t have to agree with me.
It’s not a direct threat if you don’t agree with me.
You’re free to have your opinions.
These are mine. I want to say one last thing.
I have been burned friendships in the past.
I understand how scary it is to be vulnerable again
after that experience.
I also wanna say the number one thing my boyfriend encourages me to do.
Follow my dreams that are just mine.
Pursue my hobbies and passions that are just mine.
And spend a lot of time with my friends,
watering my friendship. He absolutely encourages me so,
so much to prioritize my female friends.
And my boyfriend has never encouraged me to do anything quite like
he encourages me to prioritize the other women in my life
and that he’s a good man. Savannah.